i carry your heart

Hello from my heart to yours....

"i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)" ee cummings

This is a semi-recycled blessing... every so often, something happens and I say, "I have had this feeling before.. I have written about it... let me see what I had to say.."  and I go through he archives... not that much has changed since I sent it almost 2 years ago.. but the story has... I carry more hearts than I did then... many more.. and I feel so blessed that I am able to do so... anyway...... today's story was triggered by boxes and boxes of shoes.. yep, SHOE BOXES... my mind works that way.. lol... In 2005, Cameron Diaz starred in a movie called, "In Her Shoes" .. it is an adorable story about sisters who have nothing in common but their shoe size... 

This past weekend, my youngest sister had a beautiful baby girl.. They named her Sabina ... precious, precious, little thing... but the blessing is not about her... it's about the shoe boxes...

I stayed at my friend's apartment in downtown Orlando.. I haven't seen her for about 20 years (possibly more), but we email and text sometimes and when I said I was on my way there, she immediately offered me her apartment.. mind you, she was at St. George Island and she told me that I probably wasn't going to see her but for an hour or 2 on Saturday when she was popping in to change and go on some other adventure... I was cracking up of course... these are the kinds of friends I have... the "forever" kind...

Anyway, I took my 17 year old son with me and well.. you know teenagers are snoopers... he opened up the closet door and you would've thought he won the lotto... he yelled, "Mama.. look at all these shoe boxes.. and fabulous shoes.. I think they are your size, too.."  and so there I was, trying on her chic shoes... hahahahahaha...  and thinking of all the "posh" events we used to go to when we lived and worked at the Capitol together... and I thought of the movie... and felt such a warm feeling for my "sister" .. and I remembered the poem...  "i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)" .. seriously, don't you just want to cry? the emotion that comes with those words is enough to make anyone want to, I think...... it's no wonder that it's always been one of my favorite poems.. after all, I am hopelessly in love with "My People" ... (yep.. you guys again... ) ... and this "Sister" of mine.. she has been carrying my heart, too.. a huge autographed photograph of us from 1993, in sheer silliness, hangs in her in her office.. a Rod McKuen book that I had copied for her to give her inspiration to continue writing is on her bookshelf... packs of cigarettes hidden in a drawer for me just in case I wanted a puff after drinking the beers that she left in the fridge for me.. and a note that simply said, "Little One" .. that was me.. that's what she has always called me... 

Oh wow...... ramble, ramble, ramble... the poem... although this poem is so often used in a "romantic love" context, if we think about it as God speaking those words to us, a feeling of comfort comes over us... we are filled with love... if we are secure in the fact that God is carrying our hearts, then, it becomes so simple for us to carry one another's hearts, doesn't it? Since I wrote the first "i carry your heart" blessing, my youngest and I adopted the phrase.. every time we leave one another, and at bedtime after prayers, instead of saying, "goodbye" or "goodnight", we say several things .... it goes like this: "Asalaam Aleikum.. Sat Sri Akaal.. I have faith in you.. Namaste.. (and finally).. I carry your heart".. to which he always responds, "I carry yours forever" ... 

I can think of so many "hearts" I carry... even friends (like this "sister") that I haven't seen in 20 years or more... I think of them and my heart smiles... and then, I stay in their apartment for a weekend and it just confirms it for me... carrying people's hearts is easy when you allow God to carry yours... 

So, let me close with this proposal of sorts... a little task for you all... first imagine God carrying your heart.. feel His love for you.. then, look around you.. maybe start with your spouse or your significant other... and then, continue with your children, your family, your friends and even your co-workers (as many are your friends) and say to yourself or out loud, "i carry your heart, (i carry it in my heart)" ... let yourself feel the emotion of the words fill you... watch as the one you are saying it to is filled with the emotion you are giving them ... don't be afraid to cry because I think you will want to, too... truly feel the love that is within you ... you are all loved beyond measure and cherished blessings to the world.. we should all carry one another's hearts in our hearts just as God so graciously does for us.. it really isn't that difficult for us to give something that we have an abundance of..... LOVE....

May your day be blessed with all things good,

i carry your hearts, (i carry it in my heart)

I love you,

Elena